Kink on tap

I totally get where you're coming from, and I appreciate you're giving it another shot. It does get soapboxy, and I did recommend you start listening right in the middle of the American mid-terms when things were quite vicious between the parties, and there had been a lot of bad-mouthing on both sides. Another annoying thing about the cast (aside from the giant file size) is that it's done through skype, which means there's a delay for some of the people on the call, which leads to a lot of unintentional talking over each other.

I guess ultimately it's not a political podcast, it's a sexuality podcast, so it's not going to give the most rounded views politically. I hope another one piques your interest more, I do appreciate that you're listening. I get the opportunity to listen to a lot of podcasts so I'm kind of viewing it as just one facet of a lot of the media I'm reading at the moment, so it has a lot more context for me and may not speak to you as readily without listening to a good 10 episodes.


Anyways, thanks for giving it a listen :).

I've been listening to episode 61 which is loosely based around abortion but it's pretty much the same problem. One thing I find frustrating is the patronising take these podcasters have on all Republicans without giving any sort of credibility to their arguments. I'm almost offended for my conservative friends. Also, the way they delve into the inner psyche of the conservative mind without giving any bearing to variability in education and socioeconomic status is really quite arrogant. They need to acknowledge the education they've been privileged enough to have. Anyway, I've made my point.

Are there any episodes you think are particularly good to listen to? Also, you need to rec me more podcasts or other social media because it sounds like you've really had the opportunity to work out what's good in your areas of interest.

wrote you a novel of a comment >.>

Yeah I did kind of take into account that they were coming from an unashamed left perspective on that cast. I definitely take your point.

I will have to go through and try and find which episodes I found particularly useful and helpful to think about...some of those that involved transgender issues I found particularly useful because I got sooo much information that I'm already applying to my perception of gender in the real world. And just a lot more understanding of how people who incorporate BDSM into their lives arent' mentally ill, which is often the only way that they are identified in certain parts of the world. And there was some great stuff on sex work and ethical pornography, which may or may not interest people (or moreso may turn people off just by the fact it's sex work and pornography) but interests me because I think it's an undeniable part of human history, and links in with endless political, moral and scientific debates IMO.

You ask me to recc you some more stuff...I'd really love to but if you think kink on tap is a minefield with one-sided opinions then think of the good stuff in the rest of the stuff out there as finding needles in haystacks. The good stuff and/or the stuff that's relevant to your interests. The problem with the world of all this 'kink' and sexuality stuff is that there is absolutely nowhere else where things get spoken about on such a level playing field...so many disparate topics with no one afraid to just ask 'I don't understand, can you please explain?' The BDSM community can be just as judgmental and exclusive as any other, and Kink on Tap often had people with very disparate opinions asking each other why they thought that way (perhaps the episodes I pointed you to weren't the best example of that). It isn't a podcast that fits an agenda, as all the other podcasts and blogs out there pretty much do. They're set to a very small audience and often are full of advertising for products I really don't want to endorse in any way (pornography I object to, sex toy manufacturers with debatable ethics). When I found Kink on Tap I was elated to find people talking about things that interested me without making me feel like I had to already know everything, or made it a fetishised space, incompatible with 'normal' ways of thinking.

Which is why I'm so sad to hear it's ending :( Number 67 will be the last cast, or at least the last for a long time. May is suffering a lot from mental health and personal issues and no one around him has been able to help with the technical aspects of the show, and he's become really bitter about this. So he's stopping, because it's not fun anymore. This is where he talks about some of the impact the cast has had on him and others, and his view of the world (which is unapologetically opinionated): http://maybemaimed.com/2010/11/15/i-am-no-hercules/

So I'm going to have to keep trawling through (literally) a hundred blogs and feeds, and a dozen sexuality related podcasts, to find the nuggets of humanity that I can relate to or find useful in interactions in the world...it takes so much energy to find what was so effortlessly in Kink on Tap (for me).

Anyway, sorry for the rant, I will try and find a few good ones to give you to listen to specifically. :P. Thanks for reading (if you got through it all). :P

Re: wrote you a novel of a comment >.>

I wouldn't call this comment a rant at all, actually it all makes much more sense now. Going into a podcast about abortion and Christine O'Donnel are obviously going to bring out some of the most emotionally charged opinions in a group such of this and so I was probably lost for context when I noted no temperament to their opinion. It sounds to me like the podcasts I should find time to watch are the sex worker/pornography/BDSM/gender blur ones because the ideas they will generate will be new to me, relatively uncharted thought territory. Unchartered, mainly because there is a lack of podcasts or social media such as this, which I guess is why you find the podcast so enlightening. These are not unimportant issues as well, even if they are taboo, I think they're important to think about and develop an opinion on. Perhaps not one as well thought out as yours will be though, I need to develop a whole bunch of other opinions too!

I'd love to hear about any recommendations you think would particularly interesting but maybe this would be best done on an ad hoc basis because I don't want you to feel obliged to take that time. I have plenty of things to occupy me otherwise.

I'm very grateful to have you on my friendslist and as a friend by the way, the medicine bubble can be so homogenous it's good to have people who can remind me how much else there is out there.

Re: wrote you a novel of a comment >.>

If you'd like smart, and slightly less bitter political commentary from a sexual health perspective, you may enjoy Amanda Marcotte's Reality Cast (http://www.rhrealitycheck.org/blog/realitycast). I highly recommend it.

Also, for what it's worth, I really appreciated reading your thoughtful commentary about Kink On Tap.

Re: wrote you a novel of a comment >.>

A lot of my commentary was coming from the perspective that we, the far left, need to take a position of intellectual and professional highground because we owe a lot of our opinions to our education and ability to think critically, limiting the influence of preconceptions.

That being said, I think I was lost for context when I made these points because this is a podcast that really does speak to those people who are progressive thinkers but remain intimidated by the oppressive nature of society - a position I think we can all relate to. I think its a very noble thing this podcast sets out to achieve, and certainly, has already achieved to a great extent. My concern is that when opinions become too inflammatory they start putting people offside instead of drawing them into the conversation. We mustn't hate those that hate us, that's not what social progression is all about.

Re: wrote you a novel of a comment >.>

A lot of my commentary was coming from the perspective that we, the far left, need to take a position of intellectual and professional highground because we owe a lot of our opinions to our education and ability to think critically, limiting the influence of preconceptions.

Attempts "to take a position of intellectual and professional highground" is what the left has done for over 30 years. Before we were called "elites," we were called "eggheads." I think you and I have radically different perspectives on this. From the perspective of The Left, however, the novel perspective is the one I hold.

I think I was lost for context when I made these points because this is a podcast that really does speak to those people who are progressive thinkers but remain intimidated by the oppressive nature of society - a position I think we can all relate to. I think its a very noble thing this podcast sets out to achieve, and certainly, has already achieved to a great extent.

Thanks. :)

Re: wrote you a novel of a comment >.>

I suspect our perspectives are more closely alligned than you think. I've had many heated arguments with people I respect only to come to a final conclusion that, actually, we both think the same thing.

I think you're talking about the left-wing intellectual snobbery idea and the problems associated with socially branding the left with this label. I think it's a mistake to try and distance ourselves from education and intellectualism as to do so would be a self-denial of sorts. It's a sad irony that the left is now accused of elitism but I don't think the answer is to pretend like it's not the way we work. I'm actually not very well versed in politics and social theory though, my background is science, and I don't understand the 'novel perspective'. I would be very happy for you to link me to some description of it or else any opinion piece on tackling elitism within the left.

Re: wrote you a novel of a comment >.>

Thanks for this.

a lot more understanding of how people who incorporate BDSM into their lives arent' mentally ill, which is often the only way that they are identified in certain parts of the world.

[…]

May is suffering a lot from mental health and personal issues …

I found this juxtaposition very interesting. Many people do not realize how unjust circumstances make it difficult for people like us to thrive and how often that very difficulty, inflicted through the cultural terrorism of shame- and fear-based messaging (http://maybemaimed.com/2010/08/10/how-sex-negative-lies-perpetuate-a-fear-based-culture/), is then used to kick us while we're down under the pretense of our mental defect. It is unequivocally cruel, corrosive over time, and must end sooner rather than later.

Anyway. Finding this comment tonight made my night. Thanks.

Re: wrote you a novel of a comment >.>

You finding this gave me a huge shock, I really hadn't considered my accountability concerning Livejournal comments in the wider internet space. I'm glad to have that awareness made apparent. I'm @elvishkatrina via twitter, by the way. I'm glad you found this comment, you're very welcome.

Creepily found this and wanted to comment

I agree with a lot of the points you mentioned, and I've actually *been* on the podcast a number of times.

The podcast varies a lot depending on who the guests are, and the hosts' moods. Which in a way makes sense, but I definitely do wish that there were more consistency and less blind ranting (which only escalates as the podcast nears its final episodes). So, with that said, I'd definitely encourage you and others who read this to get involved. "Be the change" and all that jazz. :) Since the podcast is on hiatus, the only way for it to return is to get a team together that can help make it happen. If you're interested, or know anyone who would be, especially folks who are a bit more moderate in their approach to commentary (if not the issues themselves), I'd say contact May and see if you can work together somehow.

Anyway, a random recommendation would be episode 44 with Lee Harrington, who is mega eloquent and fascinating to listen to. :)

Re: Creepily found this and wanted to comment

Thats.... an interesting idea. A good one, I think, actually. For a podcast such as this, where interest has not waned and people remain committed to the cause why shouldn't it continue with new people and new ideas? We all have ups and downs, after all, and the podcast obviously requires a significant investment from May. I haven't read about why he needs to take some time out but regardless there's no reason why others shouldn't be able to stand in and keep a good thing strong.

So, as you suggest, get a team together and make it happen. Should I be a part of that team? A final year medical student from Australia who is interested in sex and sex-related issues but only among many other varied interests. I'm not sure, I guess it'd be a different perspective. Perhaps a special edition Australian version of KinkonTap? If it's good enough for Oprah (she's doing some special series of her show over here this month)?